Contrary to popular belief, women really do want to have sex. They might even want to have sex more than men, but they’re at least equal. The difference comes not from biological desire differences but because of how women fare in society. Imagine if you were treated poorly every time it was known that you’d had sex with someone. That’s how women live. You get a pat on the back, and people at work take her less seriously. Women have to find their hookups covertly or they risk losing a lot of their reputation. This means that there are three things that every woman looks for when she’s considering having a casual hookup. These are the things that are going to make or break her commitment to and interest in you.
You’re Not Going to Tell Anyone
“There should be a trust factor between you and her”
Women value their discretion above all else. Remember, she has to contend with different pressures in society. Men are allowed to hookup, but women are supposed to date even if they want casual sex as badly. When you’re meeting a woman in person, she needs to know that you’re not a gossip. This means that you don’t tell her about anyone else that you’ve been with. It also means that you take what she gives you. If you two met on a sexy personals site and she said that her name was “Mindy” and didn’t volunteer any more information, don’t ask her about where she works or what her last name is. She’s set the bar and she needs to know that you’re not going to be a nosey, prying blabbermouth.
You Respect Her
This helps women to feel safe. Remember, the number one fear that women have when they go to meet a man they met online is that he’s going to kill her. She’s fighting down her fear of being murdered to grab a drink and maybe have casual sex with you. This is a huge thing for her to tackle just to have a hookup. The best thing that you can do is to make yourself seem like the nice guy you are. Don’t talk badly about other women (don’t mention “sluts” when you go to see her) and don’t try to push the boundaries that she’s set. This will let her feel safer and more comfortable around you and with what you want.
You’re Going to Be Good in Bed
“Show her a good time”
With all of the risks and fears that go into it, this one should basically go without saying. She needs to know that you’re going to be actually good in bed. This is the hardest thing to get across, because you don’t want to be crude. Basically, don’t make any jokes that are going to make it seem like you don’t understand sex. Don’t ask any questions about gender, sexuality, or “what it’s like for a woman” because she wants to think that you’ve seen enough orgasms to have a pretty good idea what it’s like for a woman. Otherwise you won’t be worth the risk.